Category Archives: health

Walking On Eggshells

I’ve come to the realization lately that when I’m “walking on eggshells” around someone it’s my indication that they are depressed and there’s a chemical imbalance going on. However, with my sensitive personality I internalize the bad behavior that comes my way thinking that I deserve it.

I grew up with a Mom who was struggling with many things in her heart and mind. Unfortunately she took that pain out on me, since my Dad would hide at work to avoid it. So “walking on eggshells” is something I grew up with, and when you’re treated badly by a parent the child takes it to heart.

I spent 7 years supporting myself prior to getting married and in that time received counseling, and worked on my self esteem/confidence/worth. With not only the help of counseling, but also chatting with family members, I learned that I didn’t deserve the anger that was thrown my way and it’s wasn’t my fault.

Now years later I have found myself in the same situation where my feet are sore from eggshells once again. One would think the counseling I received would better prepare me for my future if a loved one around me is struggling with a chemical imbalance, but it didn’t until now.

Recently that loved one had an anxiety attack, went to the ER, and is now on anxiety medication and my world is at peace again, I’m comfortable, and less stressed. I’m oh so thankful that the person was willing to get help and realize there was an imbalance.

I know realize when the eggshells are all over my floors again means that someone around me is struggling and I need to step up and help them. I hope someone would do the same if I’m depressed, because I know oh to well how it could effect my boys and they deserve nothing than 100% from me and if I’m depressed then they are cheated.

Please take the time to read Nan’s post “Owning Our Depression,” and take her advice. After reading it inspired me to write this one.

by City Chic On A Farm

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Photo graciously provided by Baroun, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved

Safety In The Sun Means Much More Fun!

Last weekend, a five month-old baby in the seaside town where I live was rushed to hospital in an ambulance with burns over 40% of his body. He was dehydrated, and according to doctors, may be at a higher risk of kidney failure. He will be in pain for some time. Like me, you will probably think that it was a barbecue accident, but no: the baby was on the beach with his family, and he was napping in the sun. He was sunburned. You can just imagine the gasps of horror in the neighbourhood!

Most of us know that we should cover up when we’re in the sun. But are we really careful enough with our kids, whose sensitive skin is much more at risk? Most toddlers HATE having sunblock applied, and squirm and wriggle so that it is nearly impossible to get it on them properly. The whole operation can be so tedious that it’s easy to do a halfway job, and then regret it later. Sometimes, like last weekend, it’s pretty sunny but the breeze blows cool and we just don’t feel hot enough to remember to reapply sunblock.

Or we might think that after months of being covered up like slugs for the winter, we NEED some colour and a little pink in our family’s cheeks. Sunshine and Fresh Air, we think. Experts recommend applying sunblock 30 minutes before sun exposure, because it takes at least ten minutes to soak in and become effective. Before you leave home is the best time! It’s easy to get out into the great outdoors, and spend a few minutes unpacking and a few minutes getting comfy, and then start to look for the sunblock… by which time the kids have been in the sun, unprotected, for fifteen minutes. And THEN you have to catch them! And yes, a child – even an adult – can burn in fifteen minutes on a hot day.

One bad sunburn in childhood or adolescence can more than double the risk of skin cancer in later life. And in the short term, unprotected exposure to the sun can cause pain, blistering, dehydration and heat stroke. Sunburn can take all the fun out of your day out.

So we must be vigilant in our crusade against those harmful rays.

It is good to get into the habit of applying sunblock at a certain time of day: When my family is on a beachy holiday, sunblock-time is built into our morning routine: Breakfast, Sunblock. The kids take it for granted, and line up with minor moaning about the sun not even being UP yet. (Why oh why do they have to get up so early, so hungrily, and so loudly, on holiday mornings?)

Another routine that really works, especially for younger kids, is an early lunch and an after-lunch indoor or shade activity. This is great for so many reasons: Kids are generally hungry earlier when playing on the beach (and getting up too early), and they are generally exhausted by midday. Serving lunch in the shade or indoors at eleven prevents overtired-and-hungry meltdowns (you know the ones), and then you can keep the kids in playing after lunch, during the hottest hours of the day (eleven to three). They may even nap! You can use this opportunity to fill them with fluids, like water or juice. Then, reapply sunblock before heading back into the sunshine, rejuvenated!

You may have noticed that I’m using a tactic here which little kids love anyway: Routine. Develop sun habits that are healthy, and later on you may notice that your older kids keep them, reading in the shade after lunch or watching a DVD.

If you’re just heading to the beach for the day, you could try another sunblock tactic: Sunscreen-and-a-Treat! Ice lollies while sunblock is re-applied? A favourite drink? Chips and dip? A good tactic for older kids, because you’re not yelling “Come and let me reapply your sunblock!” you’re yelling “Ice lollies!” … see, you can’t lose. Get everyone to drink some juice or water, too. They are bound to feel thirsty, and it is important to stay hydrated.

Ideally, sunblock should be reapplied every two hours when you’re in the sun, so if everyone’s on the beach for the whole day, regular sunblock-and-hydration breaks are a must.

I know that hats are good for blocking the sun, but don’t think that you can skimp on the sunblock if your child is wearing a hat. The sun’s rays reflect off of sand and water, and sneak in under the brim of any hat… and a hat can (and probably will) be removed. So can a T-Shirt. My kids think I’m weird, but I tend to apply sunblock and then a T-Shirt, and that means that if they take their T-Shirt off, I don’t have to panic.

Some types of sunblock can get into kids’ eyes and they sting. Ow! I can see why anyone would squirm and complain about this. For faces, it’s best to use a clear stick designed especially for the face. It doesn’t rub off easily, and never runs into eyes. I like to use a factor 50 if I can get it (although there are claims that factor 50 isn’t THAT much more effective than factor 30 block). For the rest of the body, any sunblock with an SPF of 30 or higher is fine. If kids are swimming or sweating, waterproof block is essential.

Use liberally! Skimping will make sunblock less effective. Experts estimate that most parents use half the recommended amount of sunscreen. Creams are much better than sprays for this reason, the gunkier the better. If you prefer to use a spray-on sunscreen, at least use a good thick cream for the first application, and rub it in well.

Remember to apply sunscreen to all of those easily-forgotten bits: The ears, which can stick out and catch the sun terribly! The feet, calves, knees. The arms, all the way down to the fingers. The parting in their hair. The back of the neck. The tummy. And remember that sunblock is non-negotiable. I have seen parents get into lengthy whining matches with their kids, and agree to put the sunblock on ‘In a while’. Are they mad? If your child would rather not wear a seatbelt, would you give them their way?

And do remember to set a good example. Apply sunblock to yourself! Get a truly gorgeous hat! Expound upon the virtues of sunblock, its anti-ageing effects, its ability to keep you comfortable after a day out. An extreme tan is no longer cool, anyway. Especially not on your children.

by Nan Sheppard

Photo graciously provided by .: sandman, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved

My Good News

These past couple weeks have been a whirlwind of emotions for me. I have to confess that I had been incredibly stressed out. Why so much so? Because I had my first of the follow up appointments for the cervical dysplasia. This is the one I was told would be the most likely to come back positive. Starting with this April’s appointment I would need to have 4 negative pap smears in a row, given once every 3 months for a year, before I would be officially out of the woods. If any of them is positive, I would have to start back over. Of course if one is positive, I will repeat the test to make sure it’s not a false positive.

Needless to say, I was nervous. I went in for my appointment and my doctor told me that “it” didn’t look good. My cervix was irritated and the last and only time that happened, well I was diagnosed with cervical dysplasia. We talked about scheduling another procedure where he would remove a small part of my cervix.

I can’t really begin to put into words what was going through my mind. Relief that this was only cervical dysplasia and not something more serious as well as fear that…OMG I still have cervical dysplasia. Add into the mixture that I”m working with a triathlon coach for my first Olympic tri, and I was scared about the procedure, and that I live really far away from family and I was scared….and…and…and…I was just plain scared. I knew in terms of procedures that this wasn’t the end of the world by any means, but I was still going to loose part of my cervix.

During this past week I’ve gotten into a couple fights with family and friends. The weeks before I had done so leaving me pretty much having fought with everyone who’s close to me in the past few weeks. I was irritable, edgy, and did I mention just plain old scared?

It was like a filter was removed and I just said what I felt unfortunately just not in the best ways or many times in ways that I was proud of saying. If I could re-do it, I would have said things differently. At the same time, I have a tendency to act like everything is fine when it’s not so maybe it wasn’t such a terrible thing.

I got wonderful news though a couple days ago. My pap smear result first of all came in early and second was negative!!! So while I’m not officially cleared, I still have another 9 months and 3 more pap smear tests to go, I feel incredibly relieved. It looks like frequent menstruation may be what’s causing the irritation since this all started when I went off the Pill due to headaches. I’ll be meeting with my ob/gyn to discuss my options.

Everything looks good. I feel back on track. Of course there’s a tiny part of me that wonders what it will be like for me in July when I have my next appointment.

by Alex Elliot

Photo graciously provided by mockstar, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved

Parenting In The Media: Dinner Makeovers for Picky Eaters

Here’s a link to a step-by-step program for slowly adjusting home dinners prepared for your picky eaters. As the mom of a picky eater, I frequently search for these types of articles. Here’s one that came to my inbox today:

Dinner Makeovers For Picky Eaters

Shouting From The Rooftops: Breastfeeding Older Babies Is Great!

A couple of weeks ago, I asked my readers on a few websites one question: If you breastfed for over a year (the WHO recommends at least two, but we‘re flexible here), what do you think helped you to get that far?

For such a vague and unscientific question, I was grateful for all of the thoughtful and positive answers I received. In all, there were around thirty comments and emails from breastfeeding mothers (and one ad for a hands-free cup [?], and one enthusiastic husband who ‘Still enjoys breastfeeding’!). Long-term breastfeeders really got their teeth into this topic!

What struck me most was that many of the commenters did not find themselves taking to breastfeeding like a duck to water: Initial difficulties like caesarean delivery, sore nipples or a baby in neonatal care who was given bottles of formula in the first week, or a slow start with milk taking a while to come in, did not faze the determined mothers. It seemed that with first babies in particular, there were difficulties to overcome in the first weeks. “Number one was definitely the hardest” sighed one, although one mum who had an easy time with her first three and huge difficulties with her fourth wrote: “…would recommend to all to try, as the closeness and satisfaction it brings stays with you forever.”

What made these Mums keep at it, in spite of those exhausting first few weeks of soreness and milk supply issues?

“I just determined that I WOULD do this!” Several mums said that they absolutely wanted the best for their babies and refused to think of quitting early on. This determination saw them through the rough patches of infancy and once the issues were sorted out, it was smooth sailing for the next year or two. Research and information on the benefits of breastfeeding gathered beforehand seemed to fuel this determination.

“There is a difference between a baby surviving and thriving.” The health benefits for babies made many mums keep trying. And the continued benefits for toddlers, like greater resistance to allergies and a stronger immune system, made many continue for over a year.

“This too shall pass!” Sighed one tired, experienced mother, knowing that the early days of constant feeds soon settle down to a more predictable and relaxed routine.

Apart from determination, mothers talked about the support they got from their own mothers, their husbands or partners, and their friends. One mother was persuaded to stop breastfeeding her baby at age one, because of her own mother’s reaction: “I was made to feel like a freak… for my second, I decided to completely ignore any comments…” It’s interesting how much our own mothers’ opinions shape our parenting style!

Co-sleeping, now thought to be a factor in favour of a sufficient milk supply, was mentioned by some mums as being just too easy to ignore. “Get up to make a bottle?”… “I’m lazy, and couldn’t be bothered with the sterilizing and making formula.” In fact, lazy parenting got an all-round thumbs up: “Laziness is what got me through!” commented one mum, while another liked the flexibility: “Leaving the house involved diapers, wipes and boobs!”

“And selfishness!”, piped up another, reminding us that the chances of breast cancer are reduced by 63% when a woman breastfeeds for a total of 6 years – that’s three kids for two years each- a huge reduction! Imagine, if every woman breastfed an ‘average’ number of kids for the WHO-recommended time, breast cancer rates would be cut in half! Some findings suggest that breastfeeding may prove just as effective as Tamoxifen, a drug used in women to reduce breast cancer risk, in women with an immediate relative who had breast cancer.

Of the thirty women who wrote in, several returned to work early. They kept up breastfeeding by expressing their milk at work, and in one case having the baby in a nursery nearby. While returning to work made ‘Demand Feeding’ impossible during work hours, it did not seem to dampen the enthusiasm. For mothers who could stay at home, Demand Feeding certainly helped them: “As long and as often as the baby wanted,” said one mum.

I was certainly impressed with the enthusiasm that this topic generated. A few mums mentioned that “others find it odd to see a nursing toddler” and that if society’s perceptions were different, it would be easier to nurse for a longer period. Some mums defiantly defended their right to nurse a baby of any age in public: “I managed to feed my daughter in the bar after my husband played football, and not one of the 22 burly footballers made any comment whatsoever! Although even if they had, I wouldn’t have stopped.”

Those first two years are over so quickly and they are, developmentally, the most important in a baby’s life … as one mum said, “The time passes so quick – but the benefits last a lifetime.”

Amidst all of the self-congratulation, a few mums reminded us that not all mothers breastfeed with such success. There are many reasons for this, and a mother can formula-feed and still be a wonderful parent. But it’s fun to pat ourselves on our backs and talk about how, once you get used to it, long-term breastfeeding can be a beautiful gift to your children AND yourself.

Too often, mothers who nurse older babies are made to feel like weirdos, and it’s good to shout about it from the rooftops! And if we can persuade more parents (and grandparents) that “Breastfeeding for two years and beyond” is not only WHO-Recommended but Wonderful and Enjoyable, we may make the world a better, safer place for babies and mothers.

by Nan Sheppard

Photo graciously provided by Ronen’s Dad, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved