Tag Archives: school

Transitions

kids in classMy youngest is leaving elementary school this year.  My oldest is leaving middle school for the high school.  How did this happen?

I remember the first day of kindergarten for them both so well.  those days when Moms would have a coffee we called “YaHoo/BooHoo” – a celebration of getting the kids back into school, but some sadness that the playtime of the summer was gone and our babies were on their own again, at least between 9 am and 3:30. And now, my oldest is taller than I am and hasn’t even hit his growth spurt yet. My 10 year old’s pants seem to get shorter by the day, and his biggest need is to have afternoon snacks in the house and to have transportation to his various social appointments.

For the kids, the transitions to these new stages in school seem mostly like big adventures.  If they are nervous at times, they seem to hide it well.  For me, it’s sometimes harder.  For years, you try to help your kids become independent, and as they finally do, they need us less, and there’s a sense of loss that accompanies that.  What is it with parents?  We can’t wait for them to grow up so we have some time to ourselves, and then when they do, we miss them being younger and more dependent.

It’s the crazy dichotomy of parenting.

I know parents before me, including my own, went through this, and parents after me will as well.  But it’s also true that like the very act of becoming a parent in the first place, there’s some of this stuff you might sympathize with, but can’t really empathize until you’ve been there yourself.  I try to keep all those wise words and cliches other parents with older kids use, like “learning to let go gracefully” and how puberty is hard on everyone, including the parents.   But sometimes, it’s hard to always just live in the moment, when looking forward to their future, or behind to their earlier childhood is so easy, and so much fun.


by Whitney Hoffman


Photo graciously provided by chrissuderman, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved

Volunteer-itis

orange box with the word volunteer in upper right cornerLast week was the annual book fair at our school. I’ve helped run the book fair for three years in a row, and now, this will be my last, since my fifth grader will be moving to the middle school next year. When parents have asked what we’ll do next year, I say both gleefully and with nostalgia “I’m not sure, I’ve run out of kids and won’t be here next year.”

Saying goodbye to the Book Fair is only one of the things I’ll miss next year. Being part of the PTO and the school community has been wonderful. I stepped up as Secretary for the PTO board this year, when no one else wanted the job. It meant being more involved than I planned to be, but it turned out to be so much fun and I really felt like I knew what was happening at the school. It made me feel overextended at times, but all in all, it was well worth it.

Last week also consisted of my last chaperone duty on an elementary school field trip, a 5:45 am to 9 pm day consisting of a trip for the fifth graders to Washington, DC. A fantastic day all around for everyone.

This meant (as one of my last weeks as a parent of an elementary school student) between the Book Fair, Family night, PTO evening meeting, and chaperoning, a week of almost 56 volunteer hours. It was a long week, but can I say I’ve gotten it out of my system? Probably not. While I complained about being exhausted and how crazy the week was, I was wearing my Victoria’s Secret nightshirt with the big VS on the front. I said that maybe I was taking this volunteer stuff too far, when my husband pointed out that he now knew Victoria’s true secret- the VS stands for “Volunteer” and “sucker” combined.

After composing myself from laughing too hard, I have to say, while I seem to have a “just say no” deficit when it comes to volunteering for school functions, I really love being a part of the school community. I love seeing the kids enjoy themselves. How proud kids are when they are spending their own money on books they can’t wait to read. When I bring a book home for my 14 year old and he finishes it in a day and a half-so fast from not being able to put it down for a moment. Kids taking in national monuments, not always seeing the more profound aspects, but knowing that those will sink in for them eventually. First graders rushing in with all the hope and joy in the world in the morning.

School can be such a great and magical place for kids and for adults. When school and even PTO discussions get centered around money, and programs and administrative hassles, sometimes you can lose sight of the common mission everyone shares-to make school, learning and our children’s childhoods as joyous and wonderful as possible. I know it’s hard when there are very real issues about what programs may need to be trimmed or cut completely. I know it’s hard to balance strict academics with exploration, play and discovery. I’m not sure any of this is ever easy for anybody.

But after being involved on our school, I know I pay those school taxes with a little less resentment. I buy those fund raising items with a thought that there really is good being done here. And I understand how tough it’s got to be to manage 22-30 children, not your own, every day, and make them all care about what you are trying to do with them and for them as a teacher.

I think being involved as a volunteer has made my life richer and has made me a better parent, understanding a bit more of everyone’s point of view. So if you get the chance and can spare the time, get involved. Join the PTO and do just a little bit for the greater good. Your kids will love seeing that you think education and their school is important. The teachers will know you care. And you’ll meet people you never would have know otherwise, sharing the common bond of kids and education, and I know you’ll never regret it, even when you are exhausted.

If you enjoy the posts here at GNMParents, please consider subscribing by RSS or by email. We’d love to hear more from you.

by Whitney Hoffman

Photo graciously provided by Jacob Moyer, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved

The Final Academic Sprint – How Hard To Push?

closeup of a number two pencilMy kids have, as of this writing, about 2 more months of school left in the semester. As is my custom (or parenting technique, if I’m feeling jaunty), I leave them to their own devices for most of the year, then start pressing them once spring break has broken. So here it is, time to step in and push them a bit, give them something a little more rousing than, “So, how’s it goin’ in school? Doin’ well? Good, great, proud of you, keep it up.”

It’s not that I’m detached the rest of the year, it’s just that my kids handle their business and, as long as that’s apparent, I don’t push, I just applaud when appropriate, and encourage, and occasionally ask an in-depth question or two.

As such, when I do start to goad them into focusing a little harder, I do my best to be careful that I’m not too hard on them. And this proves difficult, as the kids whine a bit when I wade in to their scholarly waters. They’re at that age when they cry the familiar cry of “I can do it!” or “I’ve got it handled!”

And they do, for the most part. But I know, from experience, that if I don’t press them after Spring Break, they ease up a little too much and their grades slip. So it’s a bit of a tightrope that I balance upon, hoping to find that middle ground between overly-aggressive coach and absentee academic adviser.

These are, indeed, the times that try men’s souls.


by Stu Mark


Photo graciously provided by Hybridotus, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved

Wish I May…

beach at sunsetI just finished up my spring break week.  Since my spring break was two weeks later than my kids’ and my husband’s, I was home most of the week with just Jack Jack.  We didn’t do a ton during the day, but the afternoons were the usual crazy busy whirlwind of carting kids to and from sports and music lessons.

And today, I went back to work.  And they whole time, I was wishing I was at home.  I really only have one more year until Jack Jack starts kindergarten, but I liked being at home.  I liked feeling like I was accomplishing things, so that the afternoon craziness also included a cooked meal that we could eat together.  I liked playing with Jack Jack.  I liked not rushing through my cup of coffee.

But, I also wanted to work.  Jack Jack was a little bit of a surprise and I had just started my job (as Dash was about to start kindergarten) and a few months later I found out that we would have child number three.  And now, I need to work.  But, sometimes I am not sure that I want to work.  So, really, what it that I really want to do?  Maybe I need to quit wishing for what I think I want and just enjoy what I have?


by In The Fast Lane



Photo graciously provided by Vince Alongi, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved

Kids Learn Languages, Adults Lost In Translation

french sign with bad english translationMy five year old granddaughter corrects my French.  Carefully, patiently, frequently.  ‘No, Grama, it’s *burrrr*’ she says, doing that impossible Francophone thing with her tongue that makes the word sound like a cat’s purr.  ‘Br?’ ‘Burrrr, BuRRRRR!  Say it again, Grama.’  Sometimes she sighs and gives it up as a lost cause.  At other times she gets stubborn and we pat the word back and forth like ping pong champions until she is satisfied.  Until the next time, when I have forgotten how again.  And the huge brown eyes roll upward as she says to herself, ‘Elle a mis ma patience à bout’.

My generation of Canadians was taught French as a Second Language starting in Grade Nine for 40 minutes a day.  We memorized vocabulary and verb structures, wrote exercises and listened to recorded voices saying simple phrases that we repeated in unison. If we weren’t doing well at it, we were allowed to substitute Latin for our second language.  Or drop it altogether.  Or never bother, if we were in a secretarial or industrial arts stream. This program taught me to read French fairly well with the aid of a dictionary, understand some slowly spoken French and get frustrated by anyone speaking it conversationally.  I can say ‘Lentement, s’il vous plaît’* and ‘Encore une fois’** very well. My husband, another product of this program, got a lot of French training as an adult because he worked as a manager for the Federal Government.  He can understand talking heads on TV, but loses it in movies. His accent is worse than mine.

My daughters’ generation got FSL for 20/40 minutes per day starting in Kindergarten.  They learned songs and stories and numbers and had fun.  Some of them even learned a good bit of French that way. Parents who were serious about the kid learning French could opt for Early French Immersion, starting at Kindergarten or Grade One. My elder daughter did ‘Late Immersion’ with a year taught completely in French in Grade Six, followed by two bilingual years and ‘Enriched French’ at high school level. She came out of that with decent conversational French, good enough to let her work in the National Park system in French.  If you were a hard working, motivated student, this program worked out well. The YD, having watched elder sister slave away at the syntax and vocabulary, tore up the application form for this option and stayed with the 40 minute program all through high school, graduating with decent pronunciation and no grammar.  When she was hired by the Federal Government and had to be ‘Level Three’ bilingual, she spent months and years as an adult in French language training and she still needs to do revision.

These FSL choices are available to my granddaughter, but her parents chose a different route.  After bilingual daycare from eight months old, she graduated to a French Language school and an attached French Language daycare. Her French was mostly passive when she started junior Kindergarten (Maternelle) at age four, and she struggled for the first few months. (Big brown eyes awash with tears, she told her mother that she was afraid of getting things wrong because she did not understand.) However, she sopped up the language like the sponge children are designed to be at four and younger and is now level with her Francophone contemporaries and doing fine.  And terrorizing her grandparents and her parents, of course.

I fervently believe in the value of banging language, grammar and vocabulary into the heads of children from birth on up. Fluency in the milk tongue and a second language if possible, good reading and writing skills made accessible by fluency: these things are the recipe for success in whatever the growing child and adult decides to do. I would be happy to argue that Barak Obama is President today because his mother hauled him out of bed very early in the morning to give him extra English training. There are a lot of routes to language competence – I’m not specifically advocating for early rising or second language immersion or cue cards here. And I don’t expect everyone to end up as a language lover who plays games with words and lives to write. But language is a tool box.  The better the tools, the better the job the tool user can do.  Even more than the bike helmet and the rubber boots and the mouth guard and the vegetables, skill with language is a survival tool, enrichment and protection all in one.

In my granddaughter’s case, success in learning a second language well enough to fit in was a hard job but her success at it has made her a much more confident child. And certainly one who can teach her old grandmother new tricks.


by: Mary G.



Photo courtesy of eco-photography, used under a Creative Commons license. Some rights reserved